Monday, November 17, 2008

If AMS was only more like Gossip Girl

1. Two senior scholars are necking surreptitiously in a dark corner of the Berkeley party. You snap a picture with your cell phone and send it to AMS-l for community ridicule.

2. You spot an Ivy Leaguer wearing a Brooks Brother suit. You scoff and mutter to your friends that BB hasn't made a real sack-style suit since the 1970s.

3. A rival grad student gives a paper that steals your dissertation topic. You rise during the question-and-answer period, and graciously thank them for their thought-provoking work. "Thank you for your paper, I found it very enlightening. I particularly admire that you were able to accomplish such excellent scholarship during what I know was an intense struggle with drug addiction, and I wish you well on the job market."

4. JAMS has recently given your article a revise-and-resubmit. You buttonhole Kate Van Orden in the hallway, who tells you that your work doesn't feel authentic, and suggests that until you've woken up in an East Village gutter in a pool of Richard Taruskin's blood, you'll never be a real musicologist.


Any others?

3 comments:

Glenn said...

Rather than Gossip Girl analogies (which I enjoyed reading), Cecilia and I tried to imagine what conferences would be like if they were structured like baseball games. So, you'd give a paper but there was always the option to bring in a reliever to read the really tough lines. And of course you had a closer to provide the big finish. Same for the Q&A -- if you got stumped by a question you'd call the bullpen to help, etc.

I think I like your analogies better though.

Ryan (recently of Brooklyn) said...

buh-rilliant.

joe said...

You've been tagged by Half a meme! Pass it on...